Homebuying More Stressful Than Dating For 59% Of U.S. Buyers, Says Redfin Survey – NMP Skip to main content

Homebuying More Stressful Than Dating For 59% Of U.S. Buyers, Says Redfin Survey

Oct 04, 2023
Millennials are plunging ahead into homeownership, despite the growing expense contributed by rising interest rates, according to new data from Ellie Mae
News Director

High mortgage rates, limited housing options, and rising costs heighten anxieties, while perceptions of stress vary across generations and racial lines.

A notable 59% of recent homebuyers found purchasing a house to be more anxiety-inducing than dating, according to a recent survey by Redfin.

“Getting ghosted by your date is stressful, but purchasing a home in today’s market comes with its own unique set of anxieties,” said Redfin Chief Economist Daryl Fairweather. “Buyers are increasingly ghosting sellers as housing costs climb, and high mortgage rates are prompting many homeowners to stay put instead of selling—meaning house hunters have a record low number of homes to swipe right on.”

Greater than the stress of buying a home were the stress of buying a car (66%) and the stress of potty training a child (61%), as per the Redfin-commissioned survey administered by Qualtrics in May and June 2023. Over 5,000 U.S. residents participated, with the insights focusing on the responses of about 1,000 individuals who purchased homes within the past year.

Given the highest mortgage rates in over 20 years, relocating has become a necessity for many, typically triggered by significant life events such as job changes or divorces. Despite a low national unemployment rate, many have faced layoffs and the need to change jobs in the last year. Notably, 10% of home sellers are relocating due to return-to-office policies.

Both Millennials and Gen Xers seemed to agree when comparing homebuying stress with dating, with nearly two-thirds echoing the sentiment. Meanwhile, Baby Boomers and Gen Zers felt dating posed more challenges. The Baby Boomer generation has now surpassed Millennials as the dominant homebuying group, largely because of their accumulated home equity, allowing them to venture into the market even amidst high mortgage rates.

Divorce stress was underscored more by older respondents. Among Baby Boomers, 67% believed divorce was more stressful compared to home buying. The figure stands at 61% for Millennials and drops to 48% for Gen Z.

There also emerged a racial divide in perceptions. While 64% of white respondents felt home buying was more stressful than college admissions, a majority of Black respondents (57%) felt the opposite. Historically, Blacks have encountered higher financial hurdles in both homeownership and college admissions than their white counterparts, often facing discrimination in both arenas. With the resumption of student loan payments post-pandemic, many Blacks could see homeownership move further out of their grasp.

About the author
Christine Stuart is the news director at NMP.
Published
Oct 04, 2023
Jobs Report Comes In Weak After Mortgage Rates Surge

Employers added just 29,000 jobs in September, sending Treasury yields lower and offering a potential counterweight to the recent rise in mortgage rates

Oct 02, 2026
Price Cuts Hit Four-Year High As Mortgage Rates Top 7%

More than one in five listings took a price cut in September, but pending sales still posted their sharpest annual decline since March 2025

Oct 01, 2026
Serious Mortgage Delinquencies Rise 19% After Five Months Of Improvement

ICE data shows 574,000 mortgages were at least 90 days past due in August, while early-stage delinquencies remained below year-ago levels

Sep 29, 2026
Smaller Down Payments Give Buyers More Room, But Rates Limit The Savings

The typical down payment fell 9% from a year ago, while shifting market conditions are giving originators different affordability conversations across the country

Sep 25, 2026
Mortgage Rates Break 7% Just As Builders Find A Way To Move Buyers

New-home sales rose 6.4% in August as builders cut prices, offered incentives, and sold more lower-priced homes. Now mortgage rates are moving against buyers again

Sep 25, 2026
Borrowers Want Digital Closings, But Some Originators Remain Hesitant

ServiceLink finds 45% of surveyed LOs cite borrower reluctance as a barrier, even though most recent buyers say digital options would influence their choice of mortgage provider

Sep 23, 2026