Self-Compassion in the Workplace

As we enter these first few months of the new year, it’s easy to find oneself in a place of frustration and disappointment for not seeing those fresh professional goals checked off just yet.

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By Mary Margaret Hogan

Event Marketing Specialist

As we enter these first few months of the new year, it’s easy to find oneself in a place of frustration and disappointment for not seeing those fresh professional goals checked off just yet. The negative thoughts are rolling in: It feels like we just rang in the new year and already, I can’t get this project to launch at work? Already, I’m feeling exhausted and emotionally depleted? 2024 just started and I’m already… failing?

Let’s take a beat and take a breath. While the pressure of a new year in the workspace may feel higher than ever, there is never an excuse to be your own worst critic. In fact, negative thoughts like this only deflate energy, and ultimately, make workdays more difficult, not more productive.

That’s why establishing a stable relationship with self-compassion should be as equally important as any professional goal this year. Self-compassion in the simplest of terms just means giving yourself the space to feel the way you are feeling, act the way you are acting, and cope with the way you are coping without judgment and through a lens of acceptance. Of course, there is a fine line. Self-compassion shouldn’t be utilized as a tool to justify missing deadlines, slacking on projects, or being a difficult co-worker. On the contrary, self-compassion is a tool that will allow you to transform into the best version of your professional self.

As women in this industry, the emphasis to embrace the #GIRLBOSS mentality is flagrantly endorsed. Work hard, play hard, grind until you see results, and no matter what DO NOT STOP! Since the dawn of our modernly accepted social media norms, there has been a rise in content geared towards the expectation of productivity and functionality during the first few months of a new year. How many LinkedIn posts did you see broadcasted in January that were simply a list of big to-dos and regimented self-schedules for 2024? Did any of them include making time to rest when their body needs it? How about a bullet point that dropped the mention of self-care? Was there a section that emphasized not being derogatory towards yourself if something you worked hard on didn’t turn out exactly as you hoped? Of course not.

While these phrases and to-dos can serve as motivation and a reminder of our individual strength and validity as professionals, it’s rarely addressed that these mentalities can lead to destructive thoughts and derail progress in both your personal and professional sphere. The gnarly infliction of comparison comes into play and suddenly, we’re questioning our worth and our legitimacy as a professional. When feelings of inferiority arise, it is the perfect time to make the empowering choice to enlist the power of self-compassion. Instead of restless and judgmental notions, try to replace and rephrase them with more kinder and compassionate thoughts:

“I’m working hard, but I’m not seeing the results. There must be something wrong with me.”
I’m proud of my hard work and will be patient with these results. Some efforts will take more time than others, I’m doing my best.

“I’m so exhausted, but I must keep working late. I don’t care if I’m feeling unwell. This is all part of the grind!"
My work will still be here if I take time to regain my energy. I will be stronger and refreshed when I return to my work.

“I have to achieve my #FitnessGoals now so I look like a professional!”
Maybe I’ll go for a run outside today. That could make me feel good. My professionalism is not proven by my workout routine.

“Everyone is posting about their professional achievements, and I’m still stuck in the same place. I guess I’m not good enough. I just don’t deserve it.”
My time will come. I am so capable. I do deserve personal and professional growth. Keep moving forward.

Though the initial thoughts may fall under the guise of motivation, these can swiftly turn sour. It is essential to approach each workday gradually for what it is and not jump to harshly criticizing or blaming yourself for a lack of professional progress. Implementing gentler, less critical thoughts, as mentioned above, can completely rejuvenate your work environment, and unleash a whole new work ethic, brimming with newfound creativity and enthusiasm for the tasks in front of you.

Self-compassion should not be misunderstood as a campaign for everyone to give up their aspirations for the year ahead. It is merely an important reminder to check-in with your mind, body, and spirit on your way to achieving these milestones. Productivity is not the sole measure of hard work. You can be powerful and take a break.

There is a difference between acknowledging where you have room to grow and demeaning hard work. Providing ourselves with the space and time to recuperate from stressors, fatigue, and other unpredictable facets of life is necessary. Whenever these feelings go unaddressed and we continue onward, it’s a recipe for disaster. Making oneself push through emotional, mental, and physical strife doesn’t lead to better work; it leads to burnout. Ignoring the depletion of energy and the increase in anxiety doesn’t create a path to healing; it creates a longer path of suffering. Adopting a forgiving nature and rational approach to “getting stuff done” and “making professional gains” will alleviate a lot of unnecessary stress and ultimately lead to more professional success.

“Productivity is not the sole measure of hard work. You can be powerful and take a break.”

Although some may read this and scoff, “Self-compassion? Who has the time?” It is a tried-and-true concept. It isn’t an innovative nor avant-garde practice, but an easy way to provide yourself with some comfort and confidence throughout your professional career. Self-compassion may just be the perfect, yet subtle reminder that you owe yourself kindness today and every day.

Sure, there is a population who can and will insist they can thrive with the overwhelming existence of impossible deadlines, regimented schedules, major professional stakes and not even need a break for a glass of water - “Time is money after all!” But if that’s not you? Have some self-compassion!

You made your bed today, you worked from home, you submitted your project on time, you almost did everything on your to-do list… or maybe, you couldn’t do all of that. And that’s okay too. We can be hard workers and we can also prioritize our mental health. Yes, we need to take up space, to employ our intelligence, and to lean into our power, but we also need to take up self-compassion.

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