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Human nature causes us to compare ourselves to other people, either intentionally or unintentionally. The social comparison theory believes that individuals evaluate their own opinions and abilities by comparing themselves to others in order to reduce uncertainty in these domains, and learn how to define self. I certainly believe that we as humans do this, but the results in this analysis can lead to absolutely nothing productive since it is an impossible task.
Think about it … you are unique. There is no other person like you in the universe. You have special individual DNA that has fundamental and distinctive characteristics and qualities, regarded as unchangeable. Your hand, finger, and other prints match no other human in existence past, present, or in the future. Acknowledging this reality can set you apart in many aspects of your life, helping you lose the bad habit of comparing yourself to others.
You have special abilities and skills that no other person has, many of which untapped. Understanding this and exposing these abilities uncovers your potential. Many of us have no idea the limits in our abilities, primarily because we place mental road blocks with doubt or uncertainty. Many of these negative thoughts have been created by inaccurate comparisons or assumptions. I believe that if we stop comparing ourselves to others, but instead compare ourselves to who and what we are individually meant to be, quality of life can vastly improve.
Use your unique gifts and talents and learn how to make them shine in your own life and the lives of others. Surround yourself with other positive people that can help you with your weaknesses. Never compare your successes or failures with other people and never let others place limits on what you can or cannot do. Set goals related to your own desires, focused on tapping into your individual gifts and potential. No human is perfect. Never be afraid to be yourself and find what truly makes you happy.
Andy W. Harris, CRMS is president and owner of Lake Oswego, Ore.-based Vantage Mortgage Group Inc. and 2010-2011 president of the Oregon Association of Mortgage Professionals. He may be reached by phone at (877) 496-0431, e-mail email@example.com or visit www.vantagemortgagegroup.com.
This article originally appeared in the January 2015 print edition of National Mortgage Professional Magazine.